Hi! I am Amie. I help people with their feelings. Big kids and grown-ups come to see me. They feel very sad. They have a crush on someone, but things keep going wrong.
Do you know what they do when they are sad? They look at their phones. They look at romantic love memes.
What are romantic love memes? They are funny pictures on the internet. The pictures have words about liking someone. People send romantic love memes to their friends. They look at them and laugh.
But laughing at a phone does not fix a sad heart. If you want a good friend or a crush to like you back, you have to do more than look at romantic love memes. You have to be a good friend.
Let me tell you how. Here are four big rules to help you keep a friend or a crush.
Rule 1: Do Not Wear an Invisible Shield
Sometimes, when we like someone, we get scared. What if they do not like us back? What if we look silly? So, we put up a big, invisible shield. We do not tell them how we feel.
If we feel sad, we do not say it. We send them romantic love memes. We hope the funny picture will do the talking for us.
But a picture cannot hug you. A picture cannot say, “I am sorry you are sad.” You have to take the shield off. You have to use your real words.
Say, “I feel happy today.” Say, “I feel scared.” Say, “I missed you.” When you show your true feelings, you make a real friend. Real friends do not hide behind romantic love memes. They look at each other and talk.
Let me tell you a story about a boy named Leo. Leo liked a girl named Mia. Leo was very shy. He did not know what to say to Mia. So, every day, Leo sent Mia romantic love memes. He sent her pictures of dogs with funny hats. He sent her pictures of cats falling asleep.
Mia would laugh at the pictures. But after a few weeks, Mia stopped talking to Leo. Leo was very sad. He came to me and said, “Why did Mia leave? I sent her so many funny pictures!”
I told Leo, “You sent pictures, but you did not send yourself.” Leo was wearing a shield. He was hiding behind the phone. I told Leo to try again. “Next time,” I said, “do not send a picture. Ask her how her day was. Tell her your favorite color.”
Leo was scared. But he tried. He put his phone away. He asked Mia about her dog. They talked for a long time. They smiled. They did not need romantic love memes to have fun. They just needed each other.
Rule 2: Do Not Wear a Fake Costume
Think about Halloween. On Halloween, you dress up like a superhero or a funny animal. But you cannot wear a costume every single day. It is too hot. It is too itchy. You get very tired.
Some people do this with their crush. They pretend to be someone else. If their crush likes the color blue, they say, “I love blue too!” If their crush likes to run fast, they say, “I love running!” even if they really want to sit and read a book. They even laugh at romantic love memes they do not think are funny, to make the crush smile.
This is a bad idea. Why? Because the costume will fall off one day. The crush will see the real you. They will say, “Wait, I thought you liked running!” You will feel tired from pretending. And you will never know if they like the real you, or just the costume.
Let me tell you about a girl named Lily. Lily wanted to be friends with a boy named Sam. Sam loved to play soccer. Lily did not like soccer. It was too hot, and she always got tired. But Lily wanted Sam to like her. So, Lily put on her fake costume. She said, “I love soccer!” She ran around in the hot sun. She even pretended to like romantic love memes about soccer that Sam showed her on his phone.
Lily was so tired. She was not having fun. One day, Lily tripped and hurt her knee. She started to cry. Sam said, “Why are you crying? We are just playing!” Lily said, “I hate soccer. I just wanted you to like me.”
Sam felt bad. He said, “I would like you even if you did not play soccer. I just wanted someone to sit with me.” Lily learned a big lesson. She did not need to wear a fake costume. She did not need to fake laugh at romantic love memes. She just needed to be Lily.
You have to be you. If you like the color red, say so. If you like to read books, read books! The right friend will like the real you. You do not need to change.
Rule 3: Do Not Play the “I Must Win” Game
Have you ever played a game with a friend? Sometimes, one person wants to win so badly that they yell. They get mad if they lose. That makes the game not fun anymore.
A crush is not a game where you have to beat the other person. You and your crush are on the same team. You should not fight to win.
Sometimes, people fight about silly things. They might even fight about romantic love memes. One person might say, “That meme is not funny!” The other person says, “Yes, it is!” And they fight and fight. Why? Just to be right.
But if you always have to be right, the other person feels bad. They feel small. They feel like their words do not matter. Then, they do not want to play with you anymore.
Think about building a tall tower with blocks. If you and a friend are building a tower, you have to work together. If you say, “My way is the only right way!” and you knock down their blocks, the tower falls. You both lose.
It is the same with a friend. Do not argue about small things. Do not say, “My romantic love memes are funnier than yours!” That does not matter. What matters is that you are building something together. Be kind. Say, “Good idea!” when they have one. Say, “I am sorry,” when you make a mistake. That is how you make the friendship tower grow very tall and strong.
Rule 4: Look Up From the Screen
Phones are very fun. It is fun to look at romantic love memes. It is fun to watch videos. But if you are sitting next to a friend or a crush, you need to look at them. Not the phone.
If you stare at your phone all day, your friend will think you do not care. They will think you like the phone more than you like them.
You have to put the phone down. Look into their eyes. Listen to their words. Ask them questions. Playing together in real life is a million times better than looking at romantic love memes on a screen. When you look at them, you are saying, “You are important to me.” That makes people feel very happy.
Time to Be Brave
It is okay to be scared. Feelings are big and loud sometimes. When you like someone, your tummy might feel funny. Your face might get red. That is normal.
But you cannot let the fear boss you around. Fear tells you to hide. Fear tells you to send romantic love memes instead of talking. You have to be brave.
Brave does not mean you are not scared. Brave means you are scared, but you talk anyway. You say, “I like you. Do you want to play?” If they say no, it might hurt. But it is better than hiding forever. And if they say yes, you will be so happy you were brave.
So, remember the rules. Take off the invisible shield. Take off the fake costume. Do not play the “I must win” game. Look up from the screen.
Romantic love memes are okay for a quick giggle. But they cannot hold your hand. They cannot hug you. They cannot be your friend. Only a real person can do that. Be a real person. Show your true heart. That is the best way to find a friend and keep them.
